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1.26.2016

When Everything and Nothing Changes

I read an article the other day on Scary Mommy and would be lying if I said I didn't feel a bit of angst and a slight tightness in my chest thinking about how my life is going to be completely altered as I welcomed my third baby into the world in just a few weeks.

It was about friendships (and relationships in general, really) and how they change so drastically when you have kids. I'll be the first to admit that I had a helluva time navigating life as a new Mom after my first was born and I know my friendships suffered because I tried to do it all on my own and really just ended up isolating myself. I consider myself very fortunate to have some really great friends that just "get me" and I had invested enough of my own heart and soul pre-kids that we made it through to the other side and found a new normal that works for us.


We might not go for coffee every.freakin.day like we used to. And we'd all pretty much agree that we don't see eachother as much we'd like but we're all still on the same page and the solid foundation we have (from high school age) allows us to face the ebbs and flows of life with little issue.

Last night was the first time in a reallllly long time that ALL of us were actually available to get together. It had literally been months (if not close to a year) that some of them had even seen eachother. We met at a local restaurant for some drinks, laughed and caught up on life but generally just existed and enjoyed eachother's company as if it had only been days that passed by since our last meeting.

"Time is the largest asset that I am lacking to be able to devote to someone I can confide in outside of my marriage. Everybody needs a friend who just emphatically gets who they are. If you have yours, hang on to that relationship and don’t take it for granted."

It was last night that gently lifted the angst I felt and softened the tightness in my chest. It reminded me that while everything in life seems to be changing, somethings really don't change at all sometimes and that's perfectly awesome. It reminded me that I DO still have an amazing circle of women around me that I know I can call on in a heartbeat if I need them (and vice versa). Most importantly, however, it reminded me that while I have a major life event coming up that would seemingly take over the entire focus of my life, I cannot forget who I am and must make it a priority to continuously reconnect with myself and those who fill my soul in ways my children do not.

That's not being selfish....that's being true to myself. 

If you're not true to yourself and don't spend time filling your own cup first, how can you truly expect to be able to serve anyone else without a whole lot of resentment and exhaustion?

I feel very blessed to have been given this simple reminder on such a random evening of good times and laughs. The timing really could not have been more perfect. ❤️

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